Think differently – and get different results! If we continue to do the same things in the same way, we are likely to get the same results.  Einstein apparently said something along these lines and he was absolutely right.

It’s too easy to stay within our comfort zone and do the same over and over.  There often comes a time when we become frustrated with the status quo but we are so far entrenched in our habits or repetition, of sticking to what we know, we cannot break out of it. This is where we need to think differently.

Think differently – try something new.

Ask yourself what someone else might do, what might your future self do, what might a competitor do?

There are so many possibilities but in the day to day of business and stress, it’s not always easy to identify them,  This is where coaching comes in extremely useful! Getting a view from the outside, and external, non judgmental perspective, can encourage you to think differently, try new ways and start seeing the change you’d like.

Get in touch if you’d like to discuss coaching.

Stop focusing on the negative!

Tendency to focus on the negative?

It’s OK, you’re normal.

It’s been proven that we tend to remember negative comments far quicker than positive ones. If we have a negative experience, that’s the one that will feature when we next encounter a similar task or activity, and not the times when things went well.

Some people will be more expert than others at focusing on the negative, making them very hard to work (or live) with. They will always seek out what went wrong, remember bad times and find fault. Read more

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“Stress makes us stupid”

5 steps to tackle stress

If  psychologist Dr Daniel Goldman’s words  “stress makes us stupid”are true, it’s no wonder we find it difficult to make simple decisions, let alone tackle larger dilemmas when we are feeling stressed.

I wonder how many of us have felt overwhelmed and stressed at work and tried to carry on without a break? As we stare at the screen in front of us, it becomes impossible to focus.  Our eyes might be able to, but making our mind focus on what we’re reading becomes increasingly difficult.  Colleagues might ask us questions, and instead of being able to respond, these questions just irritate and stress us further.  Simple tasks such as booking meetings in the diary become almost insurmountable and cause a feeling of panic and anxiety to well up inside. If we’re actually required to make more major decisions affecting the business, we just see red.  Attention span is substantially reduced and work takes longer to complete. This doesn’t just show at work, but spreads into our home life, where we become snappy, angry or distant. Read more

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The Last Word – from Bristol Business News

A couple of weeks ago, I was asked to take part in Bristol Business News’ “Las Word” column.  The BBN is worth subscribing to if you’re in business in the South West and want to keep up to date on business affairs.  It’s great for a summary of business events and comes out every Friday by email.

You can read the column here.

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Choose to do something

Choice

When I was working full time running my other business, I decided to work with a coach to see what impact they might have.  I had been getting frustrated about being so involved with the day to day of the business and wanted to move forward (or get out). It was all a bit of a vicious circle as I was so busy in the business, I couldn’t take time (or at least I thought I couldn’t) to stop and think about direction and what we wanted for the business. Read more

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Coaching and celebrating success

You celebrated your achievements?

Working with a senior executive at an engineering firm recently, I was again reminded about how so many people never celebrate their achievements or success.  They power on to the next project without taking a moment to step back and congratulate themselves.  They might even go as far as congratulating their team, or those involved in the success, but seem to overlook actually giving themselves a pat on the back. This person was talented, doing well in their career, enjoying many aspects of it and popular with their team and senior leaders.  However they felt stressed out and a little ’empty’ as they felt that they just weren’t succeeding.

As a coach, I work with many people who are pretty driven and have high expectations, just like this executive.  They often expect more from themselves than they would ever dream of asking of others.  If they let themselves down, they berate themselves and continue cracking the whip. If you recognise this pattern as something you do, then you will know that it is pretty relentless, and enormously exhausting. No matter how successful you are, you rarely feel accomplished or successful.  Your mind just focuses on the negatives, the failings, and criticism.

Stop for a moment!Take a step back

Ask yourself if this cycle is beneficial to you or those around you. If the answer is yes, then by all means, continue.  However, if there is even a tiny part of you that feels there must be another way, then take a break and think what you can do to change this behaviour. Continuing with this cycle can lead to burn out and stress, which is not something to head for lightly.

It’s not just the inner critic that makes us set another goal before we’ve celebrated the last – it’s often the fear of judgment and a worry about what others think.  If you compare yourself with others constantly, you’re also likely to think you need to press on to catch up. You might have had family that never voiced how proud they were of you and continually found reasons to criticise….. Then it’s hard to see yourself as successful, or to allow the inner voice to encourage and support.

Starter for ten…

Here are three simple ways to take a moment to focus on your successes.

When did you last tell someone about your achievements? If you don’t feel comfortable about this, why not write some down. Be kind to yourself and realise that self-flagellation is not necessarily the only way to succeed. If you take a moment to focus on what you have achieved, it’s a moment to down tools, get some perspective, let some positive feelings flood your brain.  “But I may never get back to being a high achiever again – I might start slacking” is a response I often hear. Ask yourself ‘who is in control?’ Are you likely to suddenly change a lifetime of hard working to become switched off? Challenge that belief, and know that you can take a break without the fear of losing your drive for ever. It’s highly likely that after a moment of self congratulation, you will approach the next project with renewed enthusiasm and greater energy levels.

Imagine yourself at the age of 85, looking back on your life. How will it feel if you realise you never stopped to look at what you’d accomplished? Take 20 minutes to ask yourself this question, as see where it takes you.

If you struggle to take a break and notice your achievements, you might benefit from looking into methods of achieving mindfulness, of increasing your ability to focus on now instead of pushing on to the future. There is plenty available online to inspire you.

Try the above, and let me know how it goes.

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